Guilt.

I have a lot of guilt over things in my life… bad decisions, disappointments, etc…

But, when someone TRIES to make me feel guilty, all it does is piss me off.

I once took kick boxing lessons.  They were one-on-one with a male instructor.  A cute, ripped male instructor.

He kept trying to get me to go out, which would have been ok, save for the fact that he was in a relationship, an “open relationship”.  Uh huh.

I just said that I’d prefer to remain friends and we did.  Then he moved out of town.  We would chat once in a while on Facebook or I’d get a random text from him.  He asked if I’d see him if he was back in town, I said “sure we could get a drink sometime.”

This past July 4th weekend, he was back in town… and I was busy, it was fucking July 4th weekend.  He was pissy about it, I was the only person he really wanted to see, etc etc…  I just said that I’m sorry he felt that way, I wasn’t changing my plans, maybe we could see each other the next time.

Then I don’t hear from him in months.

Until Saturday.  He was unexpectedly back in town and wanted to see me.  I was partially busy and partially feeling evil, so I declined.  All was well.

Until this morning.

He texted me and said today was his last day in town and he wanted to see me.  I declined (for a few reasons I won’t enumerate, that have nothing to do with him).

Now I’m getting a barrage of texts, saying that I make him feel like he’s “nothing, worthless” that I “make empty promises”, my words mean nothing and on and on and on…

I reply “Don’t play that card.”

It continues.

My final text “I’m done here, I’m not arguing.”

I swear I can’t take this drama!!! The men I want do not want me and the men that want me are fucking insane.  Is there a message here that I’m not getting?

I’m having a serious DM flare which could be making me more evil today, I don’t know… but fuck me…